is it bad that im using dev art as my own personal blog for the moment, so i can rant and rave about how my family wants to come out of the woodwork with drama because of my wedding?
and they wonder why i dont want to talk to them sometimes. because every time i do, they find some way to dismiss anything i say, and not take me seriously. or just not care. act like they do, but they dont.
its definitely not helping my artistic expression. only shutting me in further, and if it werent for jason, who has been patiently listening to me vent about it, i would have probably already lost my mind about it. oh and then on top of that, my mom blames herself for everything, and almost had a panic attack because of it and not having her medicine for a few days. but thats just between you and me. i promised her i wouldnt say anything.
but i worry about my family. and more than that, i worry about myself. am i going to get through this? am i ever going to get to have all of my family together, putting aside their differences, to be there for me?
well one can hope i suppose.